1. At a tender age, get the thought in your head that saving money isn't important.
2. Once you have #1 down pat, add the belief that you're invincible and there's always time for saving later. Bonus points are yours if you can throw in the thought that you're going to have a very successful career in (insert career choice here) and you'll make so much money and will start saving at that point.
3. Once you've achieved #1 and #2, marry someone who believes the same things. Better yet, marry someone whose beliefs are the opposite of yours. That will set you up for years of tension, arguments, and possibly even high cost attorney's fees.
4. Live beyond your means. It's best if you can live way beyond your means, continuing to believe that there's time to save later. Buy a house you can't afford, get many credit cards and run them all to the max paying the minimum payments or not paying them at all, even buy brand new gas hogging cars, preferably more than one. Just make sure they're very expensive cars and the payments are the kind that will keep you up nights. If you can throw in some trips to exotic places, all paid for with the above mentioned credit cards, of course, kudos to you!
5. Be late on your payments for the things you've purchased on credit, making it certain that you'll have high and unnecessary fees to pay.
6. Flaunt your lavish lifestyle and be the one with the deepest pockets. Treat all your co-workers and distant relatives to lunch at the fanciest places in town. Pay the bills of friends and family members who blow their money irresponsibly. Join the most exlusive and most expensive country club in town. Don't worry if you don't play golf. Get a great set of costly clubs to go in the trunk of that car you can't afford and fake it. Or get really creative and take on a very costly addiction or hobby. Use your imagination here!
7. Make sure your kids think you're rich and that they're rich, too. Buy them the most expensive clothes and send them to the most expensive schools, even if the education isn't worth the price you pay for it. And don't forget to hand them unearned allowance every week and then generously buy what they want after they've spent the allowance. In being faithful about this one you're making sure the future of your kids is about as good as yours.
There are a lot of other things you can do to ensure that you're broke and stay that way but I've given you seven of the best ways I know. The rest is up to you.
January 13th, 2008 at 06:06 am 1200204384
The sad part? A lot of that happened when I was married....
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